Growing up, I have had many different groups of friends. Youth group, neighborhood, camp, sorority, school and so on. Now that I'm married and have my own "grown-up" life, I realize how much my group of close friends has dwindled. Here might be two reasons why:
1. In December of 2006, after a sorority birthday trip to Vegas, I realized my life wasn't going much of anywhere. There on my bedroom floor, I recommited my life to my Savior. That next year I was able to go on 3 mission trips abroad. My focus became Jesus: anything and everything about Him. A lot of friendships were "weeded" out during this time. Friendships that had no meaning deeper than having fun. I started to realize that positive/like-minded friends were the most healthy relationships to have. I started over by investing in the lives of people that met this criteria. It sounds snotty now...looking back...but I think this was a huge turning point in me showing God I was serious about my life.
2. When Joseph and I started dating in 2007, my focus immediately shifted from friends to him! I was constantly wanting to be with him- even if it was watching tv together. I remember going to the Cloud's house and talking about him...way too much (they were great friends for listening to me ramble and still being just as excited for me). I'm sure this had a huge impact on my friendships as my time for others became less and less due to me spending so much time with Joseph. I wasn't as quick to "get up and go" anymore. The "rolling out of bed" phone calls to go to breakfast came mostly from Joseph now. Looking back, I could have made a bigger effort in keeping these friendships going. At the same time, I know God had a plan through that.
Now, at the ripe age of 28, I still have many groups of friends. However, I can honestly say that most all of my friendships now are based on a common faith that goes so much deeper than fun. For example: In December, Steph and Jen came to visit me while on their way home from Florida. It was then that I felt an honest sense of true friendship...different from times past. Next to my husband, these two women know most everything about me and still love me unconditionally. I feel like I can be my total self around them and they would never look at me differently. We can sit and watch tv and just be together without any agendas. It doesn't take an appointment to talk on the phone. After we see each other, they don't "call it good" for about a month when we require ourselves to catch up again so that our title of friendship can remain just that.
Not just Jen and Steph, but it's these types of friends in my life that I have come to truly adore. The friends that if I were to call in the middle of the night, I know they would pick up out of concern and not obligation. The kind of friends that will be at our side, rejoicing with us, when we start a family. Friends that, no matter what the distance, will go the extra mile for me and my family.
I want to be that same friend. I want to reciprocate those same things- even when they don't. I want to be a person that loves at all times...even those people that are hard to love. I want to be okay sitting in a conversation without being asked how I'm doing, but rather being interested selflessly in their lives. I want to remember the little things about them, their families and what's important to them. That's my genuine prayer lately.
CMO
